Those Old Dreams
by Lady Addiction
Summary: Hikaru rediscovers his old dreams and contemplates how much he had changed. Gen, oneshot, complete Please check my fic lj for replies to reviews.


_**THOSE OLD DREAMS**  
by Lady Addiction  
_

_Fandom: Hikaru no Go  
Characters: Hikaru, Akari  
Warnings: Gen, Hikaru-centric  
Pairings: None_

_DISCLAIMER: Hikaru no Go has nothing to do with me. However, this fic is my brainchild, so please refrain from posting any or all parts of this fic anywhere without permission. Linking to the post is more than welcome however, as are any comments._

_SUMMARY: One quiet day, Hikaru discovers how much he has changed._

**NOTES:**

1. Thanks very much to **Aishuu** for looking this fic over and telling me the areas where I might improve upon. Your help is much appreciated!

2. I'm a bit iffy on the canon timeline. If I remember correctly, Hikaru played soccer in his elementary years, but once he got into Haze Junior High, he went full-time into Go and he never went on to high school. Please correct me if I'm wrong.

WWWW

It wasn't that he was unhappy with his chosen life. He lived for Go, those thrilling games where his mind was the best weapon he could ever have and his reality was the tawny board in front of him. No, it wasn't that he regretted choosing Go.

But sometimes when he walked past his old elementary school, past the green fields where the new students now played new games, he remembered his old dreams, his old world.

He had only meant to stop for a few minutes, his attention caught when he noticed that the school's current soccer team were trying to work out new plays. He came forward, hands coming to clutch at the iron fence isolating the playing field. He found his head nodding as he watched them act out an ingenious play totally controlled by #6, who seemed to be center-fullback, rather than the #10 midfielder. He winced and shook his head when an overly tall forward failed to watch where he was going, hit a muddy patch from last night's rain, and slid to land with a squelching sound on his rear, ball flying far to the right. His team-mates exploded in laughter and a bearish goalkeeper lumbered over to help him stand up, the yellow-and-white uniform streaked all over with mud and grass.

It took him back, the sound of laughter and backslapping, back to the time when he was the one slipping and sliding on the muddy grounds. Once, he would have been the forward, the one driving that ball relentlessly to the enemy goal. Once, he would have been part of that huddled group, talking about their upcoming matches, the strengths and weaknesses of their rival teams, what new tech to learn or pursue. Once, he would have been the one to come home, sweaty and muddy and grinning from ear-to-ear from sweet victories or sullenly scowling from those so-few but so-bitter defeats.

There was a time when he lived for soccer, the adrenaline that came from running on legs too exhausted, unable to give in to fatigue, unable to give up that one goal that may mean a win. There was a time when his conversations were all about soccer, school, what's cool on the streets, and, if he couldn't avoid it, what girl looked best that day.

Now his adrenaline rush came from the _pachi-pachi_ of stones trapping or destroying his opponents. Now his conversations were all about new Go techniques, about how so-and-so did on such-and-such a match, about families and struggles between school and professional Go lives.

Hikaru stayed to watch until their practice ended, half remembering all those times with his fifth- and sixth-grade team-mates and rivals. He vaguely wondered what had happened to Takamura, the skinny goalkeeper who somehow managed to save goals that should have been impossible for someone his size. Or Yuushi, who had been his fellow forward and rival. Or Coach Isagaki, who had constantly irritated Hikaru with his loud voice and demanding ways, but whose brilliant training methods and tactics had brought the best in all his players.

"Hikaru?"

The young man turned away from the fence, startled. He broke into a grin when he saw Akari coming over to him. She was looking exceptionally pretty that day, her long russet hair dressed in deep-blue ribbons that matched her patterned sundress and sandals. "Hey, Akari, where are you going? Never thought you could clean up so well!"

She immediately scowled and swung her tiny blue-and-white purse at him. Hikaru laughingly ducked the blow, suddenly realizing that he hadn't seen her in several months. He stood up, his smile fading, and really _looked_ at her.

This Akari was no longer the Akari he once knew. She had grown taller, blooming into a woman's face and figure. He saw new confidence in the way she held her head and her body. She was now fully formed, where before she was only a partially fleshed-out being. Suddenly, he began to wonder how he now appeared to her. How much had he himself changed in the two years since their high school graduation?

"Oh you! I haven't seen you in a while and the first thing you do is insult me! For your information, I'm meeting Mitani-kun over at Shibuya. He's taking me to see the new American film they're showing over there." Her face grew concerned. "What about you, Hikaru? Are you supposed to be on your way to the Institute?"

Hikaru left the fence and began to walk with her to the bus station. "Nah, I just finished a game with Seto-san. I'm now on the third round for the Toyota Cup tournament."

"Seto-san? Is he the 7-dan from Okinawa?"

Hikaru looked at his old friend in surprise. "You know him?"

She swatted him with her hand. Hikaru was bemused to notice that she now sported long, elegant nails burnished with a rosy-pink tint. He still remembered when her fingernails were white chewed-up moons. "Of course I do, you idiot! Just because I'm in university now doesn't mean I no longer keep up my Go! I still subscribe to Weekly Go, you know!"

"Hmmm. So are you still trying to be a teacher?"

She shook her head. "Well, that was my goal, but now I'm interested in journalism. I volunteered for the university paper and well, I decided I'd rather be out there, trying to find new and interesting things to report than be stuck in a musty old classroom teaching brats like you!" She stuck her tongue out at him.

"Hey, you were a brat too, you know! I haven't forgotten who exactly it was that snuck a tadpole into Murami-sensei's tea!"

"I only did that because you dared me too! No way was I going to back down to you!"

"Yeah, you were such a tomboy! I still remember that time you beat up Naoki for stealing your lunch and he was twice your size!"

"Bah, all you boys were just wimps! I can't believe you let girls beat you up!" The two of them burst out laughing, tossing out old reminiscences and revelling in simply being together again.

They were at the bus stop when Hikaru looked away and abruptly asked, "So, you and Mitani, huh?"

"Oh…yeah…we're, we're together now. We've been going out for over six months," she replied quietly. Hikaru cast a sidelong glance at her. There was a sudden, uncomfortable tension.

"Is he still mad at me?"

"No, not really. I mean, it's been five years, after all. Not even Mitani-kun's that petty. He's playing Go at the salons again. He's even volunteering to teach the basics to little kids! Such a change, ne? But right now, he's working hard at his uncle's garage to be a mechanic," she explained.

"How did you guys get together?"

"Oh, it was just a small thing. I told you I haven't given up Go so I joined the university Go club. Well, we all decided to go to one of the salons to play and Mitani-kun was there, teaching a little girl some jouseki. We ended up talking and he asked me to go to one of the festivals with him, and well…" She paused for a long moment and inhaled sharply, eyes darting to his face then away. "…Hikaru, you, you're not…" Her words ran down as a pink tide came to her cheeks.

Hikaru stopped in his tracks, startled and thoughtful. Before, he would have immediately denied her claim and changed the subject. But he was different now…how different he still didn't know.

"I, no," he finally replied, "no, I'm not interested in you like that, Akari, I'm just…just surprised, that's all."

"Surprised that I could get a boyfriend?" He saw her face darkening and her fists clenching, and he quickly lifted his hands in a warding gesture.

"No, that's not what I mean! I just, it's just been an odd day, that's all." He scratched the back of his head and tried to smile. He was afraid it came out poorly. "I was watching those kids play, you know, and I just realized that I used to be like that. That maybe…" _If Sai had never come into his life… _"…maybe if I hadn't found Go, I'd be in university like you, studying to be a gym teacher, or training to be in one of the J-League teams. It just surprised me…how much things have changed."

He watched her face smooth out, sorrow and understanding darkening her brown eyes. "Yes, we have changed so much, haven't we, Hikaru?" she breathed out. She turned to look into the distance. "Do you remember when everybody said we'd one day marry?"

Hikaru coughed, flushing. "Um, well, yeah," he stuttered nervously.

Her head whipped back and she stared at him, before breaking out into a teasing grin. "Relax, I'm not making a love confession," she reassured him. "I'm with Mitani-kun now and I don't regret it at all." Her grin vanished as she sighed. "Those old dreams…"

"Yeah," he agreed with her.

"Do you ever regret it, Hikaru? Choosing to play Go?"

This time, he didn't hesitate. "No." No, he didn't regret meeting Sai, learning from him. He didn't regret meeting Touya, or Waya, or Isumi. He didn't regret those long hours of studying Go, those tears he cried when he lost.

Soccer and Akari had been his old life, part of his younger dreams. Time had run on, and he had a new life now with fresher goals.

Still, life was a patchwork of the old and the new. Suddenly, he took Akari up into a bear hug. She squealed and dropped her purse as he whirled her around mischievously. When he put her back to the ground, he didn't let go. "I'll always be your friend, Akari. No matter how old I get," he whispered into her hair.

She held him just as tight. "I know, Hikaru. I'll be there for you too, always."

They spent the time waiting for the next bus chatting.

**-FIN-**

_So what did you think? I hope neither Hikaru nor Akari turned out OOC. Please review!_


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